April again. This is a month of so many facets. The sun is intensifying , the ground is muddy but drying. The birthdays and anniversaries are many and hold joy and sorrow. A new book waits in the wings. Summer seems closer and possibilities endless. Yesterday was Easter.Family gathered at Chapin and Brianne’s beautiful home and it was amazing to see the generations from 85 to six months fill the house with love and promise.Answered prayers and bountiful blessing echoed in that home and this morning I am processing it all.This is a month for me that always requires a huge amount of processing . I do acknowledge the pain of it but so gratefully acknowledge the blessing of it as well. This is the nineteenth year we have been called to mourn but I am confident we will be carried through the struggle with as much grace and wonder as the past years afforded us. Oh how I wish Zac were here to take in the beauty and wonder of the blessing of our growing and changing family.This morning I sit in the quiet comfort of this April day and let it all settle and be.The beauty, the bounty, the blessing; the sorrow , the struggle , the heartbreak.April.