You know what. Christmas is not a perfect family movie. There is not always a happy ending. Sometimes there is sadness, disappointment, hurt and anger. Sometimes there are tears and sleepless nights. Sometimes you find yourself wishing for something you believe you see in other people’s stories, other people’s Christmas photos and other people’s lives. Sometimes you watch a platform filled with children and wish your grandchildren were standing there. Sometimes you wish your own small children still made up the crowd. Sometimes you sit in the sparkling light and wish you were a little girl again, possibly to have a do over or maybe just to appreciate what those childhood years held. Sometimes you squeeze your tear filled eyes together and conjure up a scene from the past. Your mother in her housecoat sitting at the end of your bed while your kids open their stockings. Your Dad uncovering the Kenmore sewing machine with your name on the tag on Christmas morning. Sometimes you just wish for a perfect Christmas , one made to order with all the moving parts exactly as you wish them to be. Sometimes… But Christmas is not any of those things while being all of those things. It is heartbreaking and heart mending, joyful and sorrowful, maddening and wonderful. Christmas is like every day of our complicated lives. It is all of the above and on this Christmas Eve 2018 I claim that and make the choice to be thankful for it all..